So... what's new?

Life is seemingly getting better. The 1st trimester fog is slowly lifting and more days than not I don't feel like i want to vomit all day long. (today just happens to NOT be one of those days) I actually DID throw up today, twice. Once being IN MY CAR on my way to work. Not fun. Not fun at all. Other than that minor set back, my house is staying cleaner and my family seems happier. You know that saying "happy wife, happy life" I'm starting to believe it. When I'm not happy, they're not happy.

The secret is out...

So, the secret is out. We're having baby number 2. Wow. I, HONEST TO GOD, thought we'd only ever have Kathryn. I guess God had bigger plans than that.

I'm miserable right now. Nausea, vomiting, eating ALL day, tired, bloated, growing... have i ever admitted to everyone that i HATE being pregnant.
I mean, i SERIOUSLY hate it. I just have to remember that in a short time it will all be over and there will be a wonderful pay off.

Until then, i'll try to keep my bitchyness to a minimum.

In the Big Rock Candy Mountains

Well, we're not going to the Big Rock Candy Mountains, but we are taking a weekend and going to the mountains. I'm VERY excited, and more than I; Kathryn is EXTREMELY excited. All week she's been saying "Mom, can we go to the mountains, noooow?"

I can't believe how she's growing. I was just looking at pictures yesterday of her first camping trip, she was such a little girl. Where did that little girl go? I sound so cliche saying she's growing up too fast, but it's true.

Anyway, POTTY TRAINING. It's very interesting. Kathryn is doing well at it. Mainly because she knows if she pee's or poops in the potty she gets 2 iced animal crackers, and who doesn't love those? I have 2 goals to accomplish this summer; by October Kathryn needs to be potty trained and sleeping in her own bed. (the latter of those two makes me ache a little). We never mean to co-bed with Kathryn, it just happened by a couple of random (and worrisome) events and after her first night sleeping in our bed she never went back to her own. I honest to God don't mind it, and I think Bo minds it even less, but she'll be turning 3 in September and we have to "let go" eventually.

So back to this weekend. I think the weather is going to be very nice, and we'll be about 10 minutes outside of Helen, so i can't wait to take Kathryn there. I remember going to Helen as a kid and thinking it was the most magical place. My heart bounds with joy when I think of Kathryn experiencing all of the amazing things and feeling all of the profound happiness i felt when I was a child. It is truly my ONE meaning in life... to just be sure my family is happy. It's really ALL i care about. And on that note, I'm going to go day dream that it's 4:30 and I'm leaving work...

:)

I'll be sure to post pictures from the weekend when we get back! :)

I always do this.

I've started so many blogs in my life and then i forget about them. I'm trying to NOT forget about this one.

I'm driving down the road of life. I travel this road often, and the scenery is beautiful so i never get bored. Most days I know what to expect. Last Friday I'm driving and all of a sudden I'm hit with a detour. I've detoured down this road before, it's vaguely familiar. I'm sure the farther i drive, the more familiar it will become... but i do remember that it is a long road, and it can be a little bumpy. and it's always full of surprises. It scares me a bit, driving down this road with Kathryn as a passenger. Will the road scare her? I'll just have to remind her that I'm here and I love her. I'm positive that once we get back on track Kathryn will appreciate the detour we took and talk about it for the rest of her life. This detour, while stressful, will make all of our lives richer, more meaningful, and i'm sure a little brighter.

Still, unexpected change is nerve wracking.

Just some boring rambling...

Let's start with work.

I'm the only closer right now. Just me, that's it. It is January 20th and I've closed all of 11 loans this month. THAT.IS.DISMAL. Dismal I tell you. I have to believe that things will get better. With these new Good Faith Laws that were just rolled out, on top of the RESPA reform act, on top of the high-cost loan test, it's SO FREAKING HARD to even close a loan anymore. The government is doing their best to put brokers out of business and give big banks everything. By God, i WILL fight to the death, this company will fight to the death. I will go down with this ship if that is what it takes. And if the ship goes down... I'll try working at a bank. Gotta do what you gotta do.

Lets move to home.

Home life is pretty good. Bo went to the doctor yesterday and they put him on blood pressure medication. His blood pressure yesterday was 150 something over 110. that is TOO high for someone his age. Actually, that is too high for someone of any age. If you don't know how i feel about medication, I'll fill you in, I think it's crap. There is always some side effect to the medication you're prescribed that you'll be prescribed a medication for, and so on. It's gross how pharmaceutical companies care noting of peoples health and only about money. I prefer to not contribute to the money in their pockets. Bo took his blood pressure again last night and it was WAY lower, and this morning, WAY lower again. I'm not convinced it's not something he can control using natural supplements (ColQ10) and healthier lifestyle. I mean, doctors are so quick to prescribe anyone anything now a days. It's not always the best or healthiest way.

Lets move to Kathryn.

She is A-mazaing. I mean seriously. I don't know how I produced such an amazing child. She's smart, witty, sensitive, and outgoing. She teaches me something new about life every day. She's also strong willed. She flat out refuses to use the potty. She knows when she has to go, and I can tell when she does. I say "let's go use the big girl potty!" and she flat out says "ummm, No. I don't want to." How can I make this fun for her? Really? How? I'd love to stop having to buy diapers. Now let's talk about how smart she is. Why is she smart you ask? She's a little over two years old and knows the following:

-She can count to ten in English, Spanish, and French.

-She can count much higher in English. Almost to 30.

-She can count to at least 3 in Mandarin

-She knows the entire alphabet (and almost the French alphabet as well)

-She is more fluent in spanish & mandarin that I am (thanks Dora and Kai Lan)

-She can sing "Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star", "Mary Had a Little Lamb", "We wish you a Merry Christmas", "The Itsy Bitsy Spider", "You are my Sunshine" and many more.

-Her pediatrician tells me she has the vocablulary of close to a 3 or 4 year old, and she speaks rather clearly.

-and the list goes on.

(excuse the excessive bragging, but I'm proud)

I guess I'm done for now.

The story of "us".

I feel like documenting the story of Bo and me, because i think it's a good one.

I met Bo my freshman year in high school. By this time he was a junior. My friend Miguel took me to his house one night to hang out. The instant I saw him, being the boy crazy girl that i was, i HAD to have him. He was cute, sweet, intelligent, and a little too polite. At this stage in my life i LOVED to chase boys. My mentality was that of, in the words of my two year old daughter, "boys are sooooo cute". This boy in particular, i could not shake. I enjoyed the chase more than anything and I'll be the first to admit i was a "heart breaker". I'd chase them long enough to make them like me and I'd get bored and move on. Leaving them there to wonder what the hell just happened. Bo was different though. The more I "chased" him, the more he didn't seem interested. This annoyed me very much. Along comes "boyfriend #1", the boy i ended up dating my entire high school career and a little after that. We were "together" for a little more than 5 years. Was it a healthy relationship? By all means No, it wasn't. But we won't go in to that. The point is, I come to find out later in life that Bo was interested in me too when we were merely a Freshman and a Junior in high school, but "boyfriend #1" asked Bo to back off because he was entirely too interested me; so what does Bo do? Being the nice guy he is, he takes one for the team and backs off. At the time, this was highly annoying. I understand now that everything in life is about timing and this was the universes way of being sure we could end up together later in life. Like I said, "boyfriend #1" and I dated for close to 5 years and it wasn't the healthiest of relationships. He walked all over me and I let him. I believe we broke up and got back together about 5 different times. Every time he broke up with me or "needed a break". It was back to Bo. The first time "boyfriend #1" and I broke up and I started spending time with Bo again we ALMOST made a go of it, we came very close. But Bo has this thing called a conscience, and it always works against him. He couldn't bring himself to be with me because he didn't want to hurt "boyfriend #1's" feelings. You see Bo and "boyfriend #1" were actually very good friends, for a very long time. During mine and "boyfriend #1's" relationship, not so much. "Boyfriend #1" knew how I felt about Bo and tended to be a little jealous when I would even speak of him. He was a taboo subject for the 5 years of our relationship. The long of the short is every time "boyfriend #1" and I broke up, Bo was there, weather it was to be a friend or something a little more, he was there for me, and it only warmed my heart to him that much more. Fast forward to 2004. I finally broke up with "boyfriend #1". This time Bo had a girlfriend, who needless to say really did NOT like me. (and that's putting it nicely) so he was off limits for a while. In comes Joe. (I'll call him by his real name since not too many people know it). Our "relationship" (if you could call it that) lasted about a year. It wasn't the healthiest of relationships either, but i can say that for a while he was my best friend and he taught me one of the more important things I've learned in all of my life. He taught me to NEVER take anything less than i deserve from anyone. Around the year mark of me and Joe. I caught wind that Bo and his crazy girlfriend had broken up. It was also around this year mark that i began to realize the lesson Joe was teaching me and apply it. Joe was never going to be more than what he was right then, and i deserved better than that. With that, i took my lesson and applied it and i moved on. Bo and I were both single at the same time (something that rarely happened) and we were both definitely still interested in each other (something I'm sure never went away). We started spending more and more time together, and the more time we spent together, the closer we grew. I was TERRIFIED to take things farther. I'd waited so long for the timing to be right, and the time was here. What if things didn't work out? I would rather him be in my life as a friend than not be in my life at all. About this time "boyfriend #1" was hanging around with Bo and his friends again, and that made things a little awkward. But as time went on the attraction between the two of us grew to a point that we couldn't ignore it anymore. I know peoples feelings would be hurt, and so did he, but at some point you have to focus on your own happiness and put everyone else's second. And here we are, almost 4 years later, still happily in love with a beautiful daughter. Life is as close to perfect as it can ever be. It's not always easy, and it's not always hard. But it IS; and that is what makes me happy. Waking up in the morning and knowing that all is right in the universe because we're finally where we're supposed to be... TOGETHER. Funny how timing really is EVERYTHING.

I'm going to give this a try.

I've tried blogging before, it never really goes very well. I usually lose interest after a while, but why not try again?

Life has been wonderful lately. Bo and I are both blessed enough to be doing well at our jobs and we're both WAY blessed to have a rambunctious little 2 year old running around telling everyone what to do. Kathryn is in full blow toddler mode now. She may look like Bo, but she definitely got my personality. She's outgoing and bossy. And my god is she smart. She has the vocabulary of a 4 year old, it's amazing. (and that's coming from her pediatrician, not me)

Bo and I are still looking for a place to live in the Dunwoody area, along with a daycare. We know a change is coming we just don't know when, so it's difficult to nail anything down right now. I'm nervous to put Kat in daycare. I know she'll be fine and she'll adjust just perfectly but the mother in me can only think of those first few days of "why are you leaving me here with these strangers, mom?"

The other night Kathryn asked me "Mommy, does Santa Claus not like us anymore? He hasn't come down the chimney again.". Cracks me up.